On a rollercoaster

What a weird last 5 days. I've been filled with so much inspiration, and felt so lifeless, and it's gone back and forth for the past five days. Let me tell you about it.

Friday was the best show I've ever been a part of. Not financially, not numbers-wise, but just in spirit. I mean, the numbers were great. 248 paid for an all-Michigan bill in Howell was amazing. But here's the thing. As much positive buzz as La Dispute has in this area, which annoys some people, they've earned it. They've connected with local kids in this area in a way that no other band has. Not Island View Drive. Not Tips. Not The Mathematicians. Not Monte. This band has inspired of a group of kids in an area to be together, to think outside the normal box that you're supposed to live in. It was a total inspiration to be a part of that show, and I truly felt like we were doing something right, like we were making a difference in people's lives. La Dispute has put out a record that's truly a work of art, and they work their asses off to get everything they've earned. And they're so humble.

On Saturday, we brought the La Dispute show to Mac's. That place sometimes is awesome, and sometimes is just depressing. Even with the buzz of 120 or so La Dispute fans in the room, and the amazing positive aura that is Koji, I was down most of the night. It was amazing to see so many friends, and to spend time w/ Koji and the LD boys, but I was so annoyed with the venue. Little things bother me after a while.

Koji crashed with us on Saturday night, and he's such an inspiring dude. He just has an aura of confidence about him, of caring about the world, and about people. The crew he had with him were the same, and he talked so kindly of his hometown of Harrisburg, PA, which he loved more than anything. I tried to see if Howell could be the small town that he spoke of, to see if they were comparable. Howell and Brighton are so hung up on the corporate bullshit, and the money, and the politics, I can't imagine it being anything like Harrisburg, at least the way he described it. But maybe he just sees life differently.

Sunday night, we went to the Mixtape for Stick To Your Guns and Shai Hulud. It was the first of three straight losing shows. But it wasn't the losses that bothered me. Shai Hulud and STYG were great people, but I don't feel their music. At all. The Mixtape is an interesting place, the remnants of a place that I'm jealous of. Skelletones was one of the country's longest-running true all-ages music venues, and it was a mess. The place is dying, quickly, with the new owners in place. JR's a nice enough dude, but he doesn't understand the business, and the heart has gone out of the place. I think Mirf took it with him, which is sad. His goal, upon leaving, should have been to ensure that the place stayed strong once he left. Instead, he made it an ending, leaving JR to try to save the place, with all momentum dead.

Monday, we were at Mac's with Jimmy Robbins and Mark Rose. Both nice dudes, Mark's music was really solid, but it was one of those nights that didn't belong at Mac's. Our venue situation has to be the worst of any promoter at our level. We have lots to choose from, but none exactly have it figured out. The Mixtape is cool, but two hours from here. Mac's is a dump, but we love it on and off. The Crofoot doesn't really have the location for what we're doing, though it's beautiful. And the Howell venues have their issues. I got thinking, based on my inspiration from Koji, on a possible idea for a venue in Howell, an arts center of sorts. We've had our eye on the old LanLords space in downtown Howell for years now, just solely for the location. Howell needs the kids downtown. All towns do. It's good for a vibrant downtown, to have the energy of youth. There's too many issues to make it work (mostly noise issues with the upstairs apartments), but I'm not letting the idea die. I'll find a place someday, and I've got a million ideas for what to do with it, that would be beyond any small venue you've ever seen. It would be amazing, a multi-sensory art experience.

Finally, today was simply a terrible day. From the arguments with agents about overpriced shows to the Oh Sleeper show that did 34 people, I was a miserable piece of shit all day, and I apologize to anyone who was in my path. It was so beautiful out, and I just wanted to hop on the freeway, and drive until I crossed three state borders.

There's a lot of things at work in my brain at the moment. Some are things that'll advance my current endeavors. Some are things that'll stop me from taking on too many projects outside the scope of what we normally do (see compilation CDs, Music as a Weapon battles). I'm working on ideas to eliminate the bullshit bands from our lives (Millionaires, Brokencyde), and start focusing again on local music. I feel like we're so buried in touring acts, that the locals are just pushed to the side. I'd like to build some of the talent in Michigan into local stars, and I think that can be done.

I'd really like to travel and get on the road this summer. I'd like to take Teresa with me, but still be me and do the type of things that interest me. It's going to be an interesting summer.

I'd like to diet, and get more physically active. Today, I should have been outside. I need a bike. It was a perfect day to ride a bike, and I don't own one. If I had a bike, and just put my iPod on, I could knock out ten miles a day.

And finally, I want to continue to grow the business, but start returning to the values I've had for this thing since day one. I feel like I've got dollar signs in my eyes a bit, and I've kind of forgotten what made this a success.

Time to go bike shopping. God bless the internet.